Note to all men...

So, tonight: I am returning home (alone) from an excellent night out with my friend. As I am walking home, I stop to adjust something and some young bratty man-boy (he is also on his own), half my size starts to holla at me. I ignored him. I turned around to make sure he was gone, and guess what? He was following me! My instinct told me not to walk home, because, if he worked out where I lived, there could be problems (I have been in this situation before, this move worked last time). So, I stopped, thinking of how I could make him go away. He asked me my name. I asked why. He said he just wanted to know. He asked if he could walk me home, I said no. Then (and take note MEN), he asked me if I want sex.... I told him where to go (in no uncertain terms) and continued my journey home, only this time, I speed walked, and spent my time looking behind my shoulder, to make sure that New Jack Virgin wasnt following me home. This is not the first time I have been in this situation. And I know I am not the only woman who has been subjected to this madness. A few years ago, some dude purposely got on my train (he was originally going in the other direction, he told me) , proceeded to stare at me throughout the 30 minute journey, then (almost) followed me home. I say almost because when I realised that there was no stopping this individual, I decided to stop and ask him what he thought he was doing (it was daylight, I felt that I could get away with it). So, I asked him if he had a sister. He said yes, and I asked him if he would appreciate his sister telling him that she went out on a date with some guy who followed her on the subway. He said no, the conversation ended there, and he thankfully took his ass back on the subway into the city.

Men, talk to your brothers. The ones, who think they are fresh or just need to get some; the ones who feel that they can ask a random woman to give them what they want. Enough already. Tell them there are ways to get a woman's attention, and asking for sex, two minutes after asking a woman her name, just isnt cool. Neither is following them. Tell them they could get in trouble for that - if not with the police, with the woman's family/man, or worse/better yet, the woman herself (when her foot connects with his groin). And tell them that crass talk like that doesn't make the ladies feel nice. I realise things really aren't good on the equality front (dont give me that, 'but women have great jobs' line, we still dont have equal access to power...), but this is taking the piss. The irony is I had just finished reading a great book by Jill Nelson, which made me feel empowered, but this situation left me feeling vulnerable, and on the defensive again.

If I see the brat again I am kicking him in the goolies (nuts to the rest of the world).